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Di fuck icon 1

"How the fuck did the Construction Men do this? They're shit builders!"
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"I don't know what I'm saying Fronk, and to be completely honest, I never really do"
~ DI Fuck
DI "Justice" Fuck is the only known police officer who has been brave enough to leave the confines of the Sussex Police Station and venture across the wasteland that is the city of Daniel Brighton. He is one of the primary protagonists in the Lovely Day Productions 'Brightleverse'. After Frankie and Fred rescued him from a stray packet of quavers that he believed to be following him, he dedicated his life to protecting them no matter the costs, to this day he is a hardened killer and is regarded as one of the most dangerous men in Hollingdean. (source: The Sun).

Early Life

It is still unknown when exactly DI Fuck was born, but it is known that he simply skipped childhood entirely, beginning life at the ripe age of 32 with a wife, two kids (whom he has never actually met) and an almost hilariously large mortgage of which he is very proud to have.

During his first Christmas on July 22nd, DI Fuck was given a pair of sunglasses from his long time colleague and friend General Dom Dickinson, this event was broadcast live on television and it was estimated to have over Six Hundred Billion viewers, a number DI Fuck claims he cannot count to. It was only after that he discovered the sunglasses were in fact utterly crap, constantly appearing lopsided and transparent. Despite this, DI Fuck had to continue wearing them due to a contract he made with Dickinson some time prior, only being able to take them off for brief amounts of time when he is shocked or during moments of intense exposition.

The Brightleverse

In late 2016, DI Fuck began to investigate the disappearance of Daniel Bright and ended up running into Pablo Pedro and Froble Gruber, who happened to be filming a documentary on the same subject, and while being filmed explained the official story that he disappeared after last being seen in a bin, a story which he later admitted having suspicions about at the time. At some point soon after this, his investigation was halted at the direct orders of his superior, which apparently happened multiple times.

Dom cockinson

Longtime friend and colleague Dom Dickinson

During the first Daniel Brighton presidential election, DI Fuck was assigned to protect Donald Trump during his visit to the city, spending most of his time trying to keep Billy P. Journaliste away from him. Later, after Frankie and Fred's disastrous clown hunt, DI Fuck took it upon himself to protect the two from retribution attacks of the chavs.

Despite the ongoing presidential election, law and order in the city continued to break down, and national news begged for the return of the overworked DI Fuck during his singular day of relaxation. However with the election drawing to a close the following month, DI Fuck began to bring crime under control as he moved into The Beach House along with Fronk, Frod and Ace Airman.

Finally having somewhere to call his own, DI Fuck secretly resumed his investigation into the circumstances surrounding the disappearance of Daniel Bright, coming to the conclusion that to find him, they first needed to find the still-missing Pablo Pedro and Froble Gruber. Later at the inauguration of President Trump, DI Fuck was part of the audience and by the end of the ceremony was the only one left to applaud him, despite the fact that Billy P. Journaliste was heckling him.

Involvement with the Daniel Bright Conspiracy

After suspecting for long that there was more to his disappearance than met the eye, DI Fuck began secretly investigating a few months after it happened, enlisting the support of Fronk in finding the missing Dan Bright researchers Pablo Pedro and Froble Gruber. After somehow finding Froble, the two returned to the Beach House only to find that someone had broken in while he was gone.

Di fuck dead

The last breath of DI Fuck.

After giving a rousing speech preparing the inhabitants of the Beach House for the events to come, DI Fuck and Froble Gruber then set out to rescue Pablo Pedro from Agent Mack Leash and Donald Trump, succeeding in doing so, with DI Fuck narrowly escaping from Leash after a tense standoff. Unfortunately, as Fuck made his way back to the Beach House, Leash pulled alongside him in a shitty little car and shot him in the lower abdomen. DI Fuck then stumbled along for a while before collapsing and dying outside of the safehouse which Gruber and Pedro had arrived at only minutes earlier.

Appearances

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